roommates: one year later

What I know from living with A for 400 days:

1. You never really need any setting other than “warm” for the Crockpot.  RIP chili set on “low”.

2. DO NOT let significant other buy any oven cleaner other than “fume free”  … and definitely open a window when using.

3. Attempting to divvy up chores equally is noble, but fruitless.

4. Also fruitless, maintaining a neat slipcover.

5. Learn and respect the other’s routine and quirks.  Chatting in the early morning?  Bad.  Chatting just before bed?  Bad.  Chatting while other is giving instructions to fellow platoon members in their helicopter?  Bad …. and will result in an airborne Xbox controller hurtling at your face.

6. Pick your battles.  Buying the expensive, name brand mayonnaise is not a big deal.  Forgetting to sign up for car insurance until the last minute, is.

7. Believe in The Golden Rule.  Even before we lived together, I promised myself that whatever A’s work schedule, I would try to help him out: wake up when he goes to work at 4 a.m. or make him a lunch when he worked evenings, because that’s what I would want someone to do for me.  And the times when I had to work earlier than he did, he woke up to be with me too–so I guess there is some merit to the old saying.

8. We are not the pee-with-the-door-open couple.  Or the social-butterfly-successful-party-planning couple.  Or the “indoor voices”couple.  (That last one may just be me.)

9. Men don’t care if they had beef for dinner twice in one week.  It’s meat and being prepared for them.

10. Try to reserve one day for sitting.  Just sitting.

11. Plan and make lists. I used to think my mom was crazy for her compulsive list-making and the dry erase board on the refrigerator that told all of us what we would have for dinner each night.  But it’s such a tension soother … and mine resides right next to the stove.

12. Getting married/buying a new car/getting insurance/adopting a puppy/changing your name makes you grow up fast.  Doing it all in one week, makes you grow up immediately.

13. Buy some spices.  There’s only so much black pepper can do.

14. Don’t try to decorate your home all at once.  I was so nervous knowing that my apartments looked like no one really LIVED there.   It still makes me uneasy that there is little on our towering walls, but some of the joy (and frugality) comes in piecing it together.

15. You will survive.  You will survive moving.  You will survive puppy training. You will survive any wedding.  Because you are surviving together.



what did I forget?   Eagerly awaiting comments.


2 thoughts on “roommates: one year later

  1. Mom January 26, 2012 / 8:11 am

    Never go into a relationship thinking you can change the other person. IF a change occurs, reason for celebration. If not, it is the person you chose.

  2. bairloch January 25, 2012 / 11:11 pm

    Fighting is ok. Its gonna happen. Don’t be afraid of it. Just make sure to make up afterward.

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