domesticait attempts to zumba. stop laughing.

While we are dedicated to trotting Beef around town twice a day, really the only time I work up a sweat is fanning smoke away from the detector in the kitchen (yesterday’s meals … 2 for 2!).

So, when a friend of mine became completely enamored with Zumba, the NEW LATIN FITNESS CRAZE, I decided to join her for last night’s session.

Hoo boy.

15 minutes before class:  Zumba-going friend, who also happens to be very skilled at music and rhythms and very slender, calls.

“Are you still planning on coming?”

*I pause, playing all of the embarrassing scenarios that come from huffing through an hour of cardio after seven years of sloth*


10 minutes before class: Lots of awkward standing by me, who almost forgets to check the consent form.  IT’S A SIGN.

5 minutes before class:  Hmm … a variety of women have assembled.  Maybe this won’t be so bad.


15 minutes into class:  Establish spontaneous personal ban on shimmying in public.

30 minutes into class:  HALFWAY POINT.  Hoodie is flung in the corner and am trying to keep up with the song that declares that I am sexy, and I know it.

45 minutes into class:  Zumba veteran next to me whispers, “It’s almost over.” 

60 minutes into class:  Cool down exercised to “Don’t Stop Believin’.”  As is the case after any type of physical activity, I think to myself, “this wasn’t so bad!”  

 Then  I remember the “smack the pony” move, and reconsider.

Returning home:  Loving husband, perched on the couch with a bag of Doritos, eyes his glistening wife and asks how her experience was.

“I have too many sticks up my ass for group fitness.”


One thought on “domesticait attempts to zumba. stop laughing.

  1. bairloch February 20, 2012 / 10:13 pm

    You made it through, that’s awesome.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s