They let me drive this even though I should only be allowed to pilot roller skates maybe

So on Monday I was handed the keys to a very large vehicle and trusted to safely drive it across the country.

They didn’t ask me if I’ve ever fallen asleep behind the wheel and crashed a vehicle or if I have ever tried to argue against another parking ticket because there was a grammatical error or if I’ve ever ran out of gas on the Interstate.

All they asked was for my driver’s license.  And my credit card, of course.

So now I am in the middle of Day 3 of my National Lampoon’s Relocation, and I have discovered a few things about myself in a U-Haul:

  1. I feel a strange kinship with other U-Haul drivers.  However, they do not feel the same and do not return my frantic waving.
  2. Not driving the speed limit is slowing KILLING ME.
  3. I almost forgot how to manually roll down a window.
  4. And how to drive without cruise control.
  5. And what it’s like not to have a CD player in a vehicle (SERIOUSLY U-HAUL WTF).
  6.  I am a GD genius when it comes to packing this rig.  Look upon this strategy!
  7. I thought traveling with the pets was going to be a disaster, but looking over at Beef and Chop spooning in the passenger seat or Chop staring at me with her goofy, open-mouthed smile or sticking my fingers into Tuna’s kennel and feeling him rub his cheeks against my hand makes my heart explode.
  8. Probably should not drive in the left lane, no matter how much I love it.
  9. I feel pretty badass driving this thing.  Like an Ice Road Trucker.  Or Bruce Springsteen. Or a woman whose nails are always painted.
  10. And also I cannot wait to purchase a small vehicle when I get to California.  Like maybe a moped.

The plan is still to reach Utah tonight.  I’ll catch you back here to re-cap Day 3!




One thought on “They let me drive this even though I should only be allowed to pilot roller skates maybe

  1. Judy Delperdang February 16, 2017 / 11:45 pm

    One time my mom was riding with me in my old car, and asked if I could roll down her window. They were manual. 🙂 You’re almost there..Glad you didn’t get stuck in Grand Island. It’s like the Bermuda Triangle of the Midwest.

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